swirling and curling
My thoughts. They're swirling and curling. Now they're starting to keep me up at night. Insomnia is becoming more and more frequent. Struggling to go to sleep. Slipping in and out of sleep. Finally relief when Ellis wakes up, providing me an activity, a reason to be awake. Even if it's just to watch him roll-over and to set up right again, then to watch him fall back asleep.
Sleep is so precious, yet it is now also sacrificed. Everyone sleeps but me. Lately I've been feeling slowly drained and emptied. I'm tired. Looking into my baby's trusting eyes, I gladly give up a good night's sleep, an evening's relaxation, a day's work for him. But even he's asleep. It's my stupid thoughts that are keeping me up. At the end of the day, I've poured myself empty. Do I have to empty myself into the night, too? This has been such an exhausting year.
Comments
Oh J- I feel your sleeplessness, I have thoughts that keep me awake too long too. Take some good hardy stroller walks, work up a good sweat. Ease some decaf into your life. But I totally understand. I'm the queen of self medicating these days. I am finally sleeping better after getting a headcold outta my system. I'll be thinking and praying for you when I go to bed...in those wee hours.
Posted by: katiek | September 25, 2005 1:53 PM