Mullin' round in my head
Warning! TMI discussion in the baby category. If you're not interested in reading about birthin' move on.
So anyway. I'm over the half-way mark in this pregnancy, getting the Stuff for the kid, but one other thing is looming and there is going to come a point when I just can't put it off any longer...getting into a birthin' class, because this baby has got to get birthed at some point. I'm the world's worst procrastinator, so at 23 weeks I'm still trying to figure out what to do in the birthin' category.
So my cards line up this way:
* I like my OB a lot; I'm perfectly happy having the baby in the hospital.
* I've been encouraged about the natural birthin' options. I didn't realize that so many people had them...it always seemed like a thing no one did. So between the fact that it is quite attainable after all and that to get an epi you have to receive a shot from a large needle, I'm perfectly happy to give it my best shot (no pun intended), but if I have to an epi I won't be devastated.
* My OB is pro-natural, too, which is nice. She's had two kids: the first ended with an epi, the second was natural.
* So the question comes down to what kind of class to sign up for. Every method has its weirdities, but I'm sure has its helpful parts, too. Everyone I know has taken the Bradley classes and really likes them...seems to be the going thing.
* My OB digs the Lamaze method as one she has done and taught.
* From my reading, I kind of tend to prefer the Bradley's approach to focusing on the pain and how to deal with it, rather than the Lamaze's approach of distraction from the pain. (I mean, really, who really can distract themselves that much? I'm sure I have ADD lurking somewhere, but I think it won't kick in enough when needed for this occasion.)
* I can't get ahold of the Bradley instruction in the area. I've emailed and left voicemail. This doesn't bode well.
* My OB is totally cool with my wanting to do Bradley, but highly recommends having a doula.
* Bradley costs a lot.
* And, having one sounds great, I don't want to pay a doula, too. (See, it's all about economics in the end.)
* I don't know how much Lamaze costs, but from what I hear, I think it's less than Bradley.
* So what if we just take the Lamaze classes and read a lot, including Bradley books, to round out our information? We're both scholars and like to read.
* I know birthin' is an important thing and probably worth the cost of preparation, but dude, I'm worried about being able to afford the basic necessities of Having a Kid.
* Has anyone done comparisons of any of these things or have any opinions?
(* ugh. I even took an internet quiz "which childbirth education class is good for you?" the answer? "It sounds as if you're interested in exploring all your childbirth options." thanks, a lot, Internet.)
And completely unrelated:
* Has anyone thought about donating the baby's cord blood? It seems like a great way to support stem cell research without having to tap into other sources for stem cells--i.e. it doesn't hurt anyone. Do it cost something to do this?
Comments
one option to add to the mix: your bradly teacher may be open to being your doula for no extra charge. at least ours did (but she did have to go home at one point, so I guess we got what we paid for).
bradley was great. worth the price, in my opinion, but do comparison shop. the discipline of practicing the relaxation stuff weekly (and daily) was a huge help.
cord blood: cool idea, but I'm willing to bet that someone else will make a ton-o-money on your donation. something about that makes me wary.
Posted by: bobw | March 17, 2005 8:30 PM
Lamaze classes in Austin were $125 for 4 weeks and had 15-20 couples per class. Bradley classes were $300 for 12 weeks and had 3 couples per class. So, that made Bradley seem like a better bargain. More time to practice relaxation (something that doesn't happen as much in Lamaze), more time to learn about all sort of facets of pregnancy, labor and delivery, all the options, etc. I felt really prepared. However, I know that some places have longer Lamaze classes and 8-10 week Bradley classes, so those are all variable factors.
We both felt very well prepared by the Bradley classes, moreso than reading Husband-Coached Childbirth, etc. The class dealt with lots of practical issues in very helpful ways. The books tend to be more theoretical.
A friend who has given birth naturally would be a good doula. We wanted a *real* doula, but they are really popular in Austin and therefore really really expensive ($800-$1500). We decided we couldn't afford it, and we'd just handle it ourselves. It ended up that I called a friend when I went to the hospital who had three births naturally and she came and stayed with me as long as I wanted her there, and would have stayed the whole time. I think a lot of women would be willing to do that... I would. The main point of a doula is to encourage and support you and to run interference with the medical staff if necessary. I think people who have btdt a few times are fully qualified, as long as they know what you want (your birth plan and the reasoning behind it.)
As far as the cord blood goes, I'd definitely look into it.
Posted by: kristen | March 17, 2005 9:09 PM
A lot of fellow diabetics are banking their cord blood in hopes of potential future medical breakthroughs. All the systems I am aware of require money -- but then again, most people save the cord blood for their own needs. I'll ask around and get back to you.
Posted by: Rebecca | March 17, 2005 9:40 PM
I know my mom went with Lamaze for me and was really happy with it, but I'll ask her if she considered other options or whether that was the only one they thought about. I wish I had some first-hand experience to give like all your other helpful commenters!
Posted by: Erica | March 18, 2005 8:07 AM
I'm bad at this kind of advice so I'm not really offering advice- just telling what I did. We couldn't afford anykind of birthin' class so I read up on it, asked anyone I knew about it and then just decided to go with whatever happened- ya know, roll with the punches kind of attitude. I wasn't pushing to go all-natural or get an epi, but I ended up with an epi and I really liked it. I didn't even notice the big needle or anything- hardly remember it now. I only remember the relief after. There were other pains worse than the big needle and if it took a big needle to get rid of them, I didn't care!
Actually, I think watching "A Baby Story" on TLC prepared me more than any of the reading I did. haha! :-P
Posted by: Anonymous | March 18, 2005 9:54 AM
D'oh! The above comment was made by your old trio bud, Rebecca.
Posted by: Rebecca J. | March 18, 2005 9:57 AM
I got a headache thinking about all the options, but then again, I wanted options when I was actually in labor. I was like Rebecca J- just read up and rolled with the punches. Now that I have actually gone through the experience, I have definite opinions for me (not for you!) about what our next childbirth will be like. We did have the epi, but in the end, for the last hour of labor I could still feel the pain... so what was the point? I am not ruling out the epi next time, but I will probably try to last longer without one... using some of those techniques they give in the birthing classes that I will read about, not pay for. (Oh, and your husband needs to be on board for what ever you do, which is why we didn't focus on one thing. We just went to the labor class where you watch all the gory videos of women giving birth.)
Posted by: mrscrumley | March 18, 2005 10:31 AM
Actually, Bob, I don't think anyone is making a ton o' money on the cord blood banking. From what I've read so far, it's extremely expensive to bank the blood, and the stem cell centers aren't getting a whole lot of financial support--esp, from the government. A lot of people bank blood privately for future use in their family, esp. if there's a high risk of cancer in the family, and that does cost something.
It seems like such a wonderful source of stem cells, esp. from something that will get discarded anyway and esp. from something that it painless to retrieve (as opposed to, for instance, bone marrow). I'd love to think I've donated something so valuable to someone else's life.
The only question I have is will it cost me something to donate? since it is so expensive to bank and the stem cell centers get so little financial support.
Posted by: Jeannette | March 18, 2005 11:53 AM
Jeannette - check out this link Donate Your Baby's Umbilical Cord Blood It might be of some help. As a person who has donated stem cells, I'm all for donating a baby's cord. The stem cell donation process is not exactly easy on the donee, or at least it wasn't a few years ago. Of course, I don't have kids and have no prospects of having kids, so I don't reall feel I can tell you what to do. Same thing about the whole birthing process.
Posted by: sarah | March 18, 2005 12:10 PM
If Bradley classes take 12 weeks, you are running out of time.
Why do you need a doula when you have ME?
Posted by: mom2 | March 18, 2005 1:40 PM
It does boil down to economics for me too. Bradley sounds awesome and fun but 12 weeks is a long time and I waited too long with Josiah. Also GA medicaid paid for a free class that was a "crash course" over 1 weekend. I did not feel like it was impersonal, cheap, or lacked ANY of the things the folks that took Bradley told me. I would check with your hospital, it's nice to meet other couples that will be delivering in the same place about the same time. Heck you might run into some of them during your stay!! Reading and asking questions and TLC is a good way to stay cheap. I would be totally fascincated with Bradley, it just wasn't financially doable. I'd rather spend the $300 on a crib, stroller and carseat.
I agree with Kristen, see if you can find a friend who has delivered naturally to be there and ask nurses questions that Chris doesn't know, doesn't want to ask. Mondo-Important!! Write a Birth Plan J! It clears a lot up for your Doc and Chris and Moms and nurses....My mom was there and she was super supportive but a lot has changed in 25 years, neither she or my mom in law felt confident in addressing the new system. Childirth, who thought it would change? But having moms there is awesome-breastfeeding doesn't change!!
Knowing about the Lactation Center at the hospital is good. Call them as soon as Ellis/Elvis arrives! They're awesome, and a bit more patient than nurses who are very busy doing other things. If you can take a breastfeeding class, or if that is included in one of the ones your looking at do it! I know Bradley does.
The cord blood thing gets you a lot of junk mail, I know that! I'd rather get free formula(for sitters) and diaper coupons. It does sound interesting, but I do think you pay an annual fee to store it.
Dude, my posts are always too long....
Posted by: katiek | March 18, 2005 2:08 PM
Katie, your posts are never too long. Thanks for all your comments, folks. I never mind long comments, as I tend to prefer getting into a lengthy discussion myself.
Posted by: Jeannette | March 18, 2005 2:47 PM
Hey Jeannette, would you email me your email address? I can't find it anywhere on your blog. Thanks!
Posted by: nick | March 18, 2005 4:31 PM